Dear Diary
by bluetarako
Summary: They've been keeping secrets from their friends and family. None of them know about their hidden diary and journal either. Hidden thoughts and feelings are revealed as they write, and we're about to take a look. [Zutara]
1. Chapter 1

_This one is going to be so much fun. Anyway, these are Katara and Zuko's private entries in their diary and journal. No one knows about them (yet), so their feelings are safe in them. The first one will always be Katara and the second, Zuko._

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Avatar or any of its characters, just this story and a few of the toys.. _(shifty eyes)_

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Dear Diary,

I just realized I hadn't written in here since I bought it in Gaoling. Well, might as well start now.

He found us again today. I'm not exactly sure how, we hadn't seen him since the North Pole and we'd figured he'd either given up or died during the siege, but he was there none-the-less. He was with the old man that helped us in the oasis. It must be his uncle or something. I couldn't see anyone other than family traveling with that brat.

His eyes. Something about them has changed. I couldn't begin to describe the furiousity of them before, but now.. now they seemed broken, as if he'd come through some dramatic change in his life. Well, that would certainly explain his appearance. He was decked out in Earth Kingdom green, a color that actually suited him. His ponytail had been cut off and he was, La forgive me, surprisingly quite handsome. Not that he wasn't before, but now he actually looked older and more his age. I'd better make sure Sokka doesn't find this.

Why am I noticing these things in my enemy? I bet he'd never do that. Is it wrong to notice things like that? Or am I simply making a rather detailed observation? Oh, how I wish for Gran Gran to be here and explain these things to me.

I noticed Toph almost in tears when the older man, Iroh I believe is what Zhao called him, was hit by the crazy girl's blue fire. Did she know him? Why would it upset her that much? I offered to help, but Zuko screamed at us to go away. Something was wrong with that picture. I had an idea and helped anyway. Sure, I risked getting burnt, but that was a risk I had to take to possibly save the life of the man that meant so much to Zuko.

Toph sunk Zuko into the ground so he couldn't protest anymore than he already had and I ripped open the burnt part of the robe. It looked pretty bad, but it healed fine. Zuko looked on, desperately trying to cover up the look of astonishment on his face once I noticed. I gave him a weak smile as Toph released him and we ran off to join the boys.

I'm not sure what came over me right then, and I sure heard about it later from Sokka, but I felt it was my job as a waterbender and a healer to help him, enemy or not. Besides, I owed the man for attacking Zhao after he killed the moon spirit. Sokka knew that too, more than anyone, but _"he's still the enemy!"_ he would say.

I hope after that, they'll give up on the chase.

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Journal-

I finally found the Avatar again! I've been tracking my sister, which isn't exactly hard to do in the vehicle she's in, and she led me right to him. I knew I couldn't beat Azula, she was much too strong, but at least I handled her better than before. I'd been training a lot since I left Uncle behind. I still feel guilty about that, but I didn't want him to get hurt because of me. I would never forgive myself.

It was strange to me to end up fighting alongside of my enemies, but we now had a common enemy. My wack-job sister. I saw the Water Tribe siblings, I assumed that's what they were anyway, and the Avatar wasn't hard to spot, but there was a new girl with them. A girl in green, an earthbender judging by her lack of shoes. Her bangs fell in front of her eyes and I had to wonder if she could see through them.

But, even though I'd never seen her, she looked as if she were going to cry when Azula hit Uncle Iroh with her crazy blue flames. Did they meet sometime in between when I left him and now? It seemed quite possible, but she's traveling with the Avatar's crew. Was he traveling with the Avatar? If he made it through this, I'd be sure to scold him for it.

That Water Tribe girl, I couldn't think of her name for the life of me, offered to help. If I hadn't been so distraught at the moment, I may have accepted it. Instead, I yelled at them to leave and threw a harmless burst of fire at them. For a second, I thought they were going to leave, but they didn't. Instead, I was sunk into the ground up to my chin while that stupid waterbender kneeled beside my uncle. I struggled to get out to no avail, yelling didn't help, breathing fire wasn't an option with my uncle that close to me, so I watched on as her hands started glowing an ethereal blue.

She looked back at me and I couldn't help but feel stupid for gawking like an idiot at her healing powers. I thought back to when I was burned. Could she have healed it when it was new? Could she heal it now? I longed to be rid of the mark of shame on my face, cutting the last of my ties to my home land. I was jolted from my thoughts when I was thrust from the ground and the two girls ran off.

My uncle's chest was exposed and I looked on in surprise. The only remaining evidence of Azula's attack was the singed part of his robe. I turned back to watch the girl in blue being helping onto the giant bison. I wanted to properly thank her, but she was still the enemy.

Why did she care about my uncle anyway? Did she know him too? I felt I was being left out of some big secret and it made me furious. I didn't want to be furious at my recently injured uncle, so I diverted it to the Avatar's group. With them flying away once again and my uncle still unconcious, I couldn't do anything but try to get him somewhere safe.

I have to stop writing for now, he's finally waking up.

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**I know I changed some, but it all fits into the juicy plot that will be Zutara. These will always be about this short, but I had 4 chapters written in one day so don't complain unless you don't like quick updates. :D**

**Jenn**


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Diary, 

We lost Appa. I'm not sure exactly what happened while we were in that library, but I know Toph tried everything in her limited power to keep him from being stolen. I mean, she is blind after all.. though we can sometimes forget that because her "sight" is so good. Today has just been an incredibly event-filled day for us, probably no more than usual though.

Okay, let's review from the beginning. Aang, hyper as usual, got us up bright and early because we were getting started on our mini-vacations today. He took us to a place at the edge of the vast desert that covers nearly half the Earth Kingdom it seems. There were little animals all over the place, gopher somethings, I don't remember what Aang called them. They kept popping out of the ground and mimicking the note Aang would play on his flute and they were so cute!

Anyway, it was time for me to decide where I wanted to go so we went to this natural ice spring. It wasn't very nice. I had a taste of Sokka's drink and it wasn't bad, but the place was still filthy. We ran into a professor from Ba Sing Se University and ended up going over the desert to find Wan Shi Tong's spirit library. That was Sokka's vacation. It was quite odd.

We did find some interesting information on the Fire Nation though, but it almost cost us our lives. There's going to be a solar eclipse this summer.. and the firebenders lose their bending during an eclipse. Kind of like what happened at the North Pole with the waterbenders. Anyway, we need to get this information to the Earth King so he can lead an attack on the Fire Nation armies that day. We were almost buried in that library when Wan Shi Tong found out our intentions.

Toph did everything she could to keep us from getting sucked into the ground, but because she was using both hands to keep us up, she couldn't protect Appa when the sandbenders stole him. Well, needless to say, Aang freaked and went off on her and I was left to defend her. He took off to find him and didn't come back until.. well, just a little while ago. We stopped to rest a little and I think it's about time to pick up again. I don't think Aang slept at all. I'm worried about him. I hope we survive this.

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Journal-

Uncle has been complaining a lot. I know he was injured, but he was also healed so he has no excuse, but I have to put up with it until I deem it necessary to tell him why there's no mark. I'm sort of hesitant to tell him we're in debt to the Avatar's girlfriend. He says there's just internal damage, but I know the waterbender girl healed him all the way. I may not like her, but I trust her that much.

We had a run-in with the Rough Rhinos yesterday. That was fun. Not really. Uncle seemed to know them, another question I'll have to ask later. We stopped in some grungy place for help. I wasn't sure what kind of help he wanted to find in a place like that, everyone in there looked like filthy bounty hunters or something and Uncle knows we're wanted. He ended up playing Pai Sho with another old geezer and I caught something about a White Lotus Order. Then we were almost attacked by two earthbenders, but everyone else in that place attacked them trying to claim us for themselves I suppose, and the old guy snuck us out.

We went to some flower shop and I got the door slammed in my face when I tried to follow them in their back room. Oh, how I wanted to just burn it down to a crisp, but they were trying to help.. and it was a Member's Only thing. At least the place smelled decent. It was filled with flowers, of course.

Now we're heading to Ba Sing Se. They got us passports and everything. I was surprised at how resourceful my uncle can be sometimes. I still wasn't comfortable about going into the heart of our enemy nation, but he assured me that we'd be safe there because we'd blend in with all the other refugees. I'm a refugee. How pathetic is that? I can't believe I let myself get this far down in the social standings. I was a prince. A PRINCE! Now I'm nothing more than a filthy lowlife peasant. It's disgusting.

The guy that helped us out of that town (in a flower pot!) gave us directions to get to the ferrys. The food is going to be disgusting, I can already tell. Tons of refugees ride them everyday and no one makes decent meals for people like that, even in the Fire Nation. This is going to be horrible.

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**R&R!**

**Jenn**


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Diary, 

Sorry I haven't updated. We made it out of the desert finally. We took a little break yesterday morning at a beautiful place with a waterfall. Sokka was trying to read a map and I accidently splashed it, but it's fine now. We were going to take the ferry into the city with this family we met at the waterfall, but ended up trying give our tickets to them because after we split up at the gates, they were robbed. The old hag at the gate wouldn't allow it though, so we're helping them get to the city another way. The Serpant's Pass.

We found Suki! She was working as a security guard at the docks and she offered to take us through The Serpant's Pass. Sokka's been acting all goofy again. I'm glad to see he's finally trying to move on from Yue. It's still hard, I know. I overheard him talking to Suki last night about her.

Hey, here's another weird fact! Toph likes my brother! After we got attacked by that serpant, which Sokka pointed out was the reason for the name of the place, I had to make an ice bridge and Toph almost drowned because the serpant broke it as she was crossing. Sokka was about to jump in, but instead Suki did and Toph got all dramatic with her thanks and kissed her on the cheek thinking it was Sokka. How does my dim-witted brother manage to get girls to like him? I'll never understand.

I helped deliver a baby today. That woman we were traveling with was pregnant and I helped deliver it. She named it Hope. I think it was very fitting. The birth brought a couple of things around. Aang finally admitted his feelings for me, as if I couldn't already tell they were there. I wasn't sure what to say. I just don't feel the same way. Maybe we'll be able to avoid the subject for a while. Suki also left us. She'd done her job, although I'm not sure how she's going to get back with a lot of the pass destroyed. Maybe she'll go down and take a ferry back. Anyway, I have to stop for now. We're almost there. I'm so excited!

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Journal-

I was right about the food. It's disgusting and I wasn't afraid to say it. I guess that's what lead me to help "liberate" some food with another kid my age named Jet. He seemed okay, but I'm not not exactly in a position to be making friends. He's fairly skilled with his twin hook swords like me with my twin dao. It was easy to steal the food from the cabin and it felt good to help the others on the ferry.. not that I would tell anyone that.

Uncle acted strange after that night. I woke up in the middle of the night and he seemed to be looking at something, but told me to go back to sleep. I'm not sure what it was, but it was obviously important. I'm getting that feeling that I'm left out of something again, so it's going on my list of questions.

He flirted with the lady that was checking passports. It was disturbing. Jet asked me to join his Freedom Fighters, but like I said, I'm in no position to make friends. If he found out who I was, he'd probably try to kill me. The way I've heard him talk about the Fire Nation, I wouldn't doubt it.

And Uncle was firebending in plain sight!! All because he got some cold tea! I smacked it out of his hand and he almost cried. Pathetic. I hate tea. And when he said he got us jobs and a place to stay, I was almost too afraid to ask. Of course it had to be a tea shop. That'll only fuel my dislike for the drink. He got a plant to make our apartment nice in case I decide to "bring home a lady friend". Yeah right. I don't want to make a life here.

I'm not sure why, but I have this strange feeling that something is happening both inside and outside the city. Oh well, there's no time to think about it now. I have to get ready for my first day of work. I'm going to hate this, I know it.

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**R&R!**

**Jenn**


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Diary, 

Yesterday had been hectic and weird and freaky and surprising. A lot of words could describe it. We had to destroy a giant Fire Nation drill, battle Azula and her croonies (I think Ty Lee likes Sokka too), and when we finally made it into the city, our guide was some freaky, weird, smiling lady named Joo Dee who didn't even seem affected at what had just gone down on the outer wall. Sokka kept trying to tell her about the information we have about the war, but she just kept waving it off. Toph said it was called "being handled".

We took a tour around the city. Aang hated it. He said the reason he never came before was because of how they had things set up; seperating the lower class and refugees from the middle and upper classes. I had to admit I hated it too. Some people couldn't help how much money they made.

We passed the palace and the creepy looking guards standing outside. Joo Dee said they were called the Dai Li. Sokka tried to tell her again about the important information we needed to get to the king, but she just kept smiling and we kept going. She's weird.

When we finally got to our house, I had to admit it was beautiful. I suddenly felt bad for all the people in the lower rings of the city while all of us lived so nicely. And we aren't even nobility! Well, maybe Toph would be considered nobility though you would never be able to tell just by looking at her. Maybe if we cleaned her and dressed her up a little, but not in her normal attire.

I got the paper this morning. Something about the king throwing a party for his "bear". I'd never heard of a bear, and apparently neither had the others. Platypus bear, gopher bear, armadillo bear, yes. Bear, no. The boys wanted to go to the party, but they were far too.. what's a word I could use.. clumsy? Close enough. Me and Toph decided we're going. I hope everything goes okay. Okay, I have to get my hair done so I have to go for now. I'll try to update soon though.

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Journal-

The tea shop isn't all that bad. I hate going from being served to serving others, but that's the way my life goes. I think the spirits are testing me. This is some kind of test or a joke or something. Ha ha, it's not very amusing. I kept getting this feeling we're being watched, so I've had to stop Uncle Iroh several times from firebending.

I was working at the shop tonight, as usual, and there were city guards in there. It made me kind of nervous, but they didn't seem to recognize me. I don't see how they couldn't, but I'm not complaining. In fact, I haven't really heard anything about the war since we came here. I'm not sure what's going on, but I think there's a conspiracy in the city. Maybe I'm just being paranoid.

Anyway, while I was working, Jet almost kicked the door down and marched in with his swords drawn. He yelled at us and accused us of being firebenders, which he wasn't wrong but we weren't about to turn ourselves in. I had to remember to scold my uncle again because I knew Jet saw his little tea trick back at the station when we got here. One of the guards was about to stand up but I took his swords and fought Jet myself.

I already said he was fairly skilled, but I said I was too so we were pretty evenly matched. He was a fair opponent, something I haven't had since my fight with the waterbender at the North Pole. It was a challenge I'd been longing for since I got here. My life was so boring now that there was no Avatar around to chase.

I almost chopped Jet's head off. Seriously. And maybe I would've felt bad for it afterwards, but at the time I was just trying to keep myself alive. Instead I just cut that stupid piece of grass he always has in his mouth. Some guards in much darker uniforms came and dragged him away after our witnesses explained what happened. I wonder what they did with him..

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**R&R!**

**Jenn**

**P.S. There's a link to the teaser trailer for the season finale in my profile. Check it out!**


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Diary, 

Toph and I went to the spa today. It was great.. except for the part where Toph threw one of the women through a wall for touching her feet. We had a mud bath and had our nails and make-up done and I felt much, much cleaner. I felt like I had finally gotten all the Appa and boy smell out of my skin. I think Toph had a good time too.

There were some snotty girls that made fun of Toph's make-up. I thought she looked pretty, but they said she looked like a poodle-monkey. Toph laughed it off though, then opened a hole in the bridge and let the girls fall through. I had to help her out, so I washed the girls away. It was quite amusing, probably more for me though because I could see how bad they looked afterwards.

When we got back, Aang told us about his little adventure while he was out looking for Appa. He built a better zoo with his earthbending just outside one of the city's walls. He didn't specify which one, so I guess I won't be going anytime soon unless he takes me. He asked around everywhere, but no one had heard anything about Appa. I hope we find him soon. Aang just isn't the same without him, but at least he's making the best of it now.

I'm not sure where Sokka went. He just took off a little while ago. He'll probably end up finding some girls somewhere and flirting. Ever since the incident with the drill a few days ago, he's become a little overconfident with girls. I've had to heal a couple bruises on his cheek from where girls would slap him. Maybe he's not as good with girls as I thought, but still there's Yue, Suki, Toph, and now Ty Lee. Who's next?

Anyway, we haven't see Momo today. We think.. well, hope he's out looking for Appa too. He hasn't been the same either. I've caught him a few times holding a clump of Appa's fur from Aang's bag as he slept. He was even sleeping with the bison whistle once. Maybe we should make posters. I'll talk to Aang about it later. Right now, I think I'll take a nice long walk. Maybe I'll go down to the lower ring or something. I've heard rumors of this wonderful tea shop down there. The finest in the city, they say.

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Journal-

Today was horrible. I finally told Uncle about Katara (yes, I remembered her name finally) healing him. I had to, he kept complaining over nothing and it finally got to me. Anyway, he said we owe her but we have no idea where she's at. If she's in the city, she's probably in one of the nicer areas, being with the Avatar and all. If she's not.. oh well. I'd hate to think what Azula would do to her if she isn't in the city. No one, not even Jet, deserves that.

Back to current events, I was getting suspicious of this girl that kept coming into the tea shop. She was in there all the time and I thought maybe she was spying on us like Jet had been. Turns out, she just wanted to ask me out. I was ready to protest, but my uncle's loud mouth beat me to it and said I'd go. I wanted to light him up like a barbeque right then, but restrained myself with a few deep breaths.

Uncle spent forever on my hair and that girl, Jin, just messed it up when she saw me. I didn't much like it anyway, but that wasn't the point. We went out to eat and the girl is a bullpig! No table manners at all, it was rather disgusting. I'd never seen a girl eat so much. She took me to some fountain she thought was romantic, but it wasn't all lit up like it was supposed to be.

Now I didn't do this to be nice. It was hard to see and I figured if the torches and candles were going to be there, they might as well be lit. So I lit them. I made her close her eyes, of course. She'd probably turn me in if she knew who I was, just like Jet. Well, she tried to kiss me. I knew what she was going to do when she told me to close my eyes and I wasn't having that. I just ran off and told her it was complicated. Hopefully she doesn't come back to the tea shop.

On my way home (probably won't get used to calling it that), I saw her. The girl, Katara. For some reason, the sight of her made my stomach churn and my voice got stuck in my throat. I guess it was the way the moonlight hit her just right as she walked along the empty street. As many times as I've seen her and even fought her, day or night, I never remember her looking that.. beautiful. Oh, Agni, I can't let Uncle Iroh find this. I'd never hear the end of it, but that's just what she was. Beautiful. So I ran the rest of the way home. And for some reason, I can't get her off my mind.

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**R&R!**

**Jenn**

**5 DAYS TO SEASON FINALE!!!! Preview in my profile!**


	6. Chapter 6

Dear Diary, 

I was right about that tea shop. It was delicious! I was thinking about taking Aang and the others down there one day, but then I saw who worked there and knew who was most likely with him. We had quite a pleasant conversation though. Apparently they were closing up when I got there, but he recognized me and invited me in anyway. I couldn't believe it when he said Zuko worked there with him. That's something I had to see, Zuko in an apron. I think I'll go back today.

Oh, and Aang found someone to print posters! Sokka attempted it, but his drawings looked.. well, a 5-year old could've done better. Anyway, we got a lot of posters and decided to spread out around the city. I told them I'd visit the lower ring. It's the perfect excuse to visit my little tea shop. And that's just what I'm going to call it now.

I wonder if we'll get in trouble for handing out the posters. I mean, does anyone even know that Aang is in the city? Well, some do but that's because of that party he snuck into a little while ago. Just couldn't keep his bending to himself. We're going to give it a shot anyway. If it's forbidden, so be it. That doesn't mean we have to stop. Well, technically it does but we're not going to.

Actually, part of me really wants to leave the city. It's weird that I'd rather be out in the war than in a creepy city that denies the existance of the war. The Dai Li and the Joo Dee's are all creeping me out, and not a good creep either. Wait, is there a good creep? Wow, am I rambling in my diary? I'm just going to stop there before I get lost. I'm off to my little tea shop with the posters!

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Journal-

Well, I get rid of one girl and another comes bouncing back into my life. This morning, Katara came in. I was more startled than anything when she walked right up to the counter and called me Lee. She must've talked with my uncle sometime last night. Why didn't he mention it? Again with the secrets. When I'm done writing this, I'll get to him.

Anyway, apparently they're looking for the Avatar's bison. She left a small stack of posters on the counter and asked Uncle if he would help pass them out to our customers. Of course, he said yes. I have no idea how she's in a good mood all the time. Uncle says it's supposed to be contagious, but I wasn't feeling it. Well, maybe I was a little. Just a little.

I think tomorrow, since it's my day off, I'll help her look for the bison. I mean, I still owe her for saving his life, right? Or did they get that worked out somehow? Oh well, it wouldn't hurt, right? Besides, it's a giant city and they need all the help they can get. It doesn't hurt that I'm an expert at finding that thing either. Or maybe it's just the Avatar I'm good at finding. Hmm.

This will be the only time I'll say this, but I hope she comes back tomorrow. If we find that stupid furry thing, my debt to her will be paid and I won't have to say that again. But she'll come back anyway, I know she will. If she talked with my uncle, then she knew I worked there too and- wait, does she like me now? No, no way, the way she said my "name" today was mocking, not suggestive.. right?

Why can't I get her off my mind?! She's all I've been thinking about all day and it's annoying! She's annoying with all her happy, optimistic, always-in-a-good-mood self! We're opposites, just like our elements. Wait, if she knows we're here, will she tell someone? Now I'm really being paranoid. And I need to talk to Uncle.

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R&R!

Jenn

Finale in 2 days! Everyone do a happy dance!


	7. Chapter 7

Dear Diary, 

I had a really good time today with the person I least expected to have it with. Yeah, Zuko. Well, I guess it's Lee now. When I went to the tea shop this morning, he seemed to be waiting for me. I guess he wasn't working today because he left with me to help look for Appa. He said he owed me for saving Iroh's life, and I wasn't going to say anything, but we had worked out last night that we were even. I needed the help.

The others followed a lead from Jet. Yeah, he found us yesterday. I wasn't exactly the most enthusiastic about it, so I told them I had a little bit of information from someone in the lower ring that I wanted to follow up. It wasn't exactly a lie. Iroh had told me about seeing Appa one night when they were on the ferry. Aang tried to come with me, but I convinced him I could handle it.

Well, Zuko and I searched all over the lower rings with me passing out flyers. We came upon a couple people who'd seen him just a couple days ago in the sky, but he landed too far away for them to see. Well, at least we know for sure he's in the city. Around midday, we stopped for lunch. The surprising thing was, Zuko just kind of.. opened up to me a little. I didn't ask him to, he always seemed kind of closed off to me, but he did. Told me about his uncomfortable date last night and everything. That part was kind of funny.

An older man gave us menus and said something to Zuko that I couldn't hear. Apparently he knew him or something. Hard to believe, I know. I never pictured Zuko as a people person. What was harder to believe was that hint of a smile at that man's comment. Maybe he's changing for the better. Maybe, just maybe, he would agree to being Aang's firebending teacher. I'll hold off that question for another day, when I get to know him a little better.

Later, we ended up checking the stables Jet had told us about, just in case the others missed something. I was surprised Zuko came with me seeing as the place was in the upper ring. It wasn't unwanted company though. I felt as if I could trust him somehow, that he wouldn't let anything happen to me. He could be a good friend, I think. All we found in the stable was a bit of fur.

Some guy working in there told us there was a group of people looking for him earlier and they said something about Lake Laogai. I wasn't sure where it was at, but Zuko led the way as if he knew. Maybe he was tracking them, I'm not sure. Anyway, we got there and split up. I ended up walking in on a battle between my friends, Jet, and Long Feng. I jumped in immediately, but Long Feng disappeared, as well as Aang and Jet.

I followed Toph and Sokka and, for some reason, it was then that I noticed Smellerbee and Longshot were there too. When we went through another door, we saw Aang knelt over Jet on the ground. He was dying, but there was nothing I could do. When we got out of there, Appa helped us fight off Long Feng again. I had a feeling Zuko had something to do with his release and silently thanked him for it. When Appa threw Long Feng into the lake, we took off. I looked back just in time to see Zuko jumping up out of the hole. I'll go back to my little tea shop tomorrow and thank him properly.

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Journal-

I had a really good time today with the person I least expected to have it with. Katara was a lot more comfortable to be around than Jin was, probably because I actually know her and we have a history. It's not exactly the best history, but.. well, I'm not really sure how to explain it. I was just abnormally comfortable around her. And she didn't eat like a bullpig when we had lunch. Because I felt comfortable, I coudn't help myself when I started telling her a little about me and my life since we'd last seen each other.

The man that served us was the same man that served Jin and I the night before. He leaned down to my ear and said "Quite the ladies man, huh?". I had to resist the urge to roll my eyes, but I couldn't help the small smile. Even with the horrid scar, I could get dates. Katara told me it made me look rugged, like a fighter, and girls like men who can fight because they know they'll be safe. That made me feel better because I think she's starting to trust me a little. Maybe I'm starting to trust her too.

After we ate, we went to the stables in the upper ring to check on a lead she'd gotten yesterday. Some old guy was in there sweeping up leftover fur from the bison. It smelled horrible, but I had to withstand it until we heard him say something about them going to Lake Laogai. I immediately grabbed her hand and walked out, then tried to track them. I remembered seeing a lake on a map that was inside the upper ring somewhere. I took a chance and that's where we went.

I could tell her friends had already been there, judging by the opening in the little platform in the lake. We went down in the hole and split up. I didn't want to, I'm assuming it was because of what she said earlier about feeling safe around me, but we had to in order to cover more ground. I thought I heard fighting sounds coming from her direction and was about to head over that way when I heard a loud noise from behind a door in front of me.

When I opened the door, I wasn't all that surprised to see the bison in there chained to the floor. He growled and tried to back away, but the chains held him in place. I held my hands up so he would know I wouldn't hurt him, then cut through the chains with my swords. He licked me. I had giant bison drool all over me and my bangs were standing straight up. It was disgusting.

He made his own way out of the underground facility, so I looked for Katara to make sure she was alright. When I couldn't find her, I climbed back out of the hole just in time to see them fly away. I'm pretty sure I saw her look back at me. I could tell she wanted to come back for me, but I couldn't blame her for not. That pathetic excuse for a warrior she traveled with would jump all over her, then me. I just made my own way back home.

Oh yeah, I did have that talk with Uncle last night. He told me what happened while he was traveling on his own and about what happened in the oasis during the siege. Now I don't feel so in the dark, but I wish I'd known all this sooner. I should probably find a better place to put this thing or my uncle will find it. He tends to clean my room for me sometimes without my permission. I think I do a good job keeping it clean. Anyway, it's been a long day so I'm done writing. I have a long day of serving tea tomorrow. I wonder if she'll be there..

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**Gah, that episode last night was disappointing, but Zuko has a good reason for doing what he did. He and Iroh have it all worked out, trust me. Oh, and I finally have a deviantART account. Link is in my profile! R&R!**

**Jenn**


	8. Chapter 8

Dear Diary, 

We split up today. After we got Appa back, we were trying to figure out what to do from there. We decided to go to the palace and try to explain to the king what's going on in hopes that he'd help us when the solar eclipse came. It took a good while and a lot of fighting because the Dai Li obviously didn't want us to get through to the king, but we finally did it. We had to take him out to the outer wall to see the remains of the drill before he believed us. That, in turn, led to Long Feng's arrest. I was excited about that.

We were discussing what to do next. They found some letters in Long Feng's office that were addressed to Aang and Toph. There was also news about my dad's fleet nearby. Aang had someone waiting for him at the Eastern Air Temple, Toph's mom was in the city and wanted to see her, and I sent Sokka to see Dad. I'm still here in the city with the king. Just before we split up, the king's guards brought word that the Kyoshi Warriors were in the city. I didn't get to see them, but maybe I'll go by sometime soon and say hi. I'm surprised Sokka didn't wait around to see Suki.

Aang tried to tell me he loved me before they left. Luckily Sokka butted in before he could. It's not that I don't love him, I just don't love him the same way. I love him like I love Sokka, as a brother. He's part of my family and I've told him that before, but I guess he didn't get it then. I think he's just got a big crush on me. Seeing as he's a monk, I don't think he's even seen a girl so it's only natural that he likes the first girl he sees, right?

Anyway, Toph went with me down to my little tea shop before she went to find her mom. The owner made us buy some tea this time because he was tired of me being in there all the time. Toph discovered she loves Jasmine tea. Iroh made her try it. Now, for some reason, she's trying to think up a nickname for Zuko. She wanted it to be fire-related, but in the lower ring people knew about the war so that wasn't a good idea. Maybe soon the whole city would know since the king knows now.

We were in there when some guys offered Iroh his own tea shop in the upper ring. I was excited for him, but Zuko didn't seem too happy. I think he's worried about Aang and Sokka finding him whenever they get back. Sokka would never approve of us being friends, much less anything else. I know it's wrong to think like that, but I do really like him. Toph said she can tell he feels the same, but I'm not sure. Part of me hopes, though.

Wow, this house is too empty. I miss Toph already.

---------------------------------------------

Journal-

This is bad. I know the blind girl, Toph, can tell. Katara explained her "vision" to me and, even though it's strange, I know she can tell. I think, just maybe, I'm starting to like Katara. It's weird and I don't know how to explain it. I mean, just two or three months ago we were fighting in the oasis at the North Pole and now.. well, I guess we're pretty good friends. I'm not even sure how we got to that point. She's the only person who's been able to look past what I am and see the real me.

She came back today. I know my debt to her was paid, but I don't want her to stop coming back. She calls it her little tea shop. I thought it was kind of cute. Some guys came in right after she got there and offered Uncle his own tea shop. He got excited, even the girls got excited, but I was perfectly fine with where we were at. I knew that if we moved into the upper ring, there'd be a chance of the Avatar and Katara's brother finding us whenever they get back from.. wherever she said they were going. Our peaceful friendship would be ruined. I know she's trying to make the best of it, even helping him name the shop, but something will go wrong.

I'm not sure why, but Toph is trying to come up with a nickname for me. She has weird nicknames for everyone in her little group. She started to call me Dragon Breath, but then she remembered that the people down here know about the war because they're all refugees. I just hope she doesn't find Angry Boy in her list of names. I hated it when Jun called me that and I don't want Toph to either. I thought it was funny when she called Katara "Sugar Queen" though.

They told me all about the battle with the Dai Li and talking to the king about the war on my break. I knew there was a conspiracy here. Katara said the city may know about it soon enough now that the king knows. At least things will be somewhat normal now, right? They still wouldn't tell me what was so important that the king had to know. I'm not sure why. I know Katara trusts me, but I just can't think of anything she would want to hide.

I saw Jin again today. She was walking past when I was sweeping the dirt out the front door before we closed up. I almost didn't recognize her because her hair was down, but she smiled at me and I knew it was her. She tried to talk to me, but I walked back inside and locked the door. Well, I'm tired. Tomorrow is going to be a long day, I can tell..

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**R&R!**

**Jenn**


	9. Chapter 9

Dear Diary, 

I just got back from a meeting with the generals today. We were just discussing boring military strategy, when and how we'll invade the Fire Nation on the eclipse and stuff. Momo thought it was quite amusing to see the big stone pieces moving around the giant map on the floor and tackled one. I said "Or we could send Momo in" and got some weird looks. I guess it wasn't as funny as I thought it was.

I went to my new little tea shop, The Jasmine Dragon, today for their grand opening. Zuko seemed unusually happy today. Iroh mentioned something about a fever, and I guess I should've already known about that seeing as how I see him almost every day. My Zuko has had a spiritual metamorphasis. I'm so proud of him. It was kind of creepy though. I've never seen a Happy Happy Zuko. It was a nice change.

They got an invitation to serve tea to the Earth King. That just made it better. I think maybe I'll join them since I'm close and personal friends with him. I don't think he'd mind at all. Maybe I'll see Suki around tomorrow. I haven't caught a glimpse of any of the warriors since they arrived. I figured Suki would be excited to find me here and hang out. Oh well, I guess they have things to do.

The Dai Li are still around. I'm still suspicious of them, I think they're still loyal to Long Feng and we may be seeing him again soon. I haven't seen Toph since we split up the other day. I'm worried that maybe her mom "convinced" her to go back to their home. Maybe it was a trap. I told Zuko about it and he's convinced it's a trap too, but I have no idea where to start looking.

Anyway, I hope Sokka and Aang are doing okay. I just have this small feeling that something's happening with both of them. Well, of course something's happening with Aang. He's learning to control the Avatar State. Who knows what kind of stuff you have to do to get that kind of power under control. I hope it's going well.

---------------------------------

Journal-

I feel much better compared to how I felt yesterday. Uncle Iroh said I underwent a metamorphasis and now I'm exactly how I should be, how I was before my banishment. I feel it too. Katara said it kind of creeped her out. Yeah, she showed up for the grand opening of the new tea shop today. Uncle finally settled on The Jasmine Dragon for the name.

Life in the Upper Ring is pretty good. It's nothing compared to the Fire Palace, but it's much better than a ship, the road, or the lower rings of this city. Uncle seems to be taking it well up here too, but I guess I expected that. He always was more susceptible to change. It's becoming easier for me to accept though, and I'm glad.

We got an invitation to serve tea to the Earth King himself. Uncle was so happy. Katara knows him personally and decided she's coming with us. She doesn't like being alone for too long. She hasn't said that, but I can tell. She's either paranoid or just lonely. I wouldn't blame her for being either, what with her friends gone and the Dai Li still about.

I think Toph is in trouble. Katara said she hasn't heard a word from her since she left to see her mom. I have a feeling it wasn't her mom she went to see. If it was, her mom isn't very nice because chances are that Toph isn't in the city anymore. I want to help Katara find her, but we don't even know where to start looking. Uncle is worried for her too.

I'm nervous for tomorrow. That's when we're serving tea to the king. I feel something big is coming, but maybe it's just my nerves talking. After all, I'm a firebender in the capitol city of the kingdom my country is trying to take down. It's not exactly what I would call safe. I hope Katara brings her waterskin just in case though.

---------------------------------

R&R!

Jenn


	10. Chapter 10

Dear Diary, 

A lot happened today and I'm almost too tired to write about it. Almost. When we went to the palace today to meet the king for tea, it turned out to be a set-up. Luckily I don't go anywhere without my waterskin, but it didn't help much. Iroh did his famous Dragon of the West breath and gave us room to escape. He blasted through a wall and jumped out, but Zuko wanted to face Azula so I stayed behind to help him.

The Dai Li kept blocking our attacks and I kept breaking the stone gloves they threw at us, but it finally got to be too much and they pinned us to the ground. We were both thrown into some kind of crystal cave below the palace somewhere. We just sat there for the longest time and I started thinking about how I'd failed my friends and my family. I didn't mean to start crying, but I did. Well, I guess in a way I'm glad I did because Zuko came over to try to comfort me.

I'm not really sure how we got onto the subject, but we started talking about our pasts. I told him about my mother's death and my father leaving to fight and how Sokka was with him now. He told me about how his mother was missing, how he got his scar, and what his life was like on his ship the two and a half years before I found Aang. I remembered my water from the Spirit Oasis thought maybe I could heal his scar with it because Master Pakku said it has unique properties. He seemed hesitant at first, but let me.

Just before I could, though, Aang burst through the wall with Iroh. I saw the glare he threw at Zuko because of how close we were when he saw us, but my back was to him so I couldn't see his reaction. I looked back at Zuko while Aang was pulling me away and could see that he and Iroh were talking. From the way he looked at me, I could tell it wasn't pleasant. We came into this big area with pillars and a river system and it was beautiful, but after we got there Azula found us.

Aang and I had no problem battling her and we were about to beat her when a fireblast came from nowhere. I looked around and saw Zuko standing in the opening we'd come from. Iroh was standing behind him with a pleased look on his face and I knew we had her beat. She actually looked panicked, but when the Dai Li showed up she smiled. There were a lot of them, but with a master waterbender, two firebenders, and the Avatar, we beat them as easily as we did below Lake Laogai.

Now, Azula is in a fire-proof cell in the dungeon. If she tries to bend lightening, it'll just hurt her because the cell it still metal and that's a pretty good conductor. Ty Lee and Mai are down there too. We all received awards for keeping the city safe, even Zuko and Iroh. Iroh is running the Dai Li now. Apparently he's more intimidating than Azula when he wants to be, so they didn't question him. Sokka and Toph are out looking for the real Kyoshi Warriors and Aang starts his firebending training tomorrow morning thanks to Iroh. With him and Zuko on our side and no more enemies in the way, this should be easy.

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Journal-

I knew my instincts were right. I was happy for Uncle that he was getting recognition for his good tea, but I knew there was something suspicious going on with that invitation. Katara had brought her waterskin and ended up having to use it like I thought when Azula and Dai Li agents surrounded us. I had to move Katara out of the way when Uncle began his demonstration on how he got his nickname. He helped us start to escape, but I was tired of running and decided to face Azula. What surprised me was when Katara turned back and stood beside me to help. It wasn't enough though and we were tossed into some cave underground.

She didn't say anything at first, but then she started yelling about how she'd failed the world and the Avatar. She started crying and I wasn't sure what to do, so I sat beside her and put an arm around her and tried to tell her it would be okay, that we would get out. It felt so strange to hold her like that, but at the same time it was as comforting for me as I hoped it was for her.

I told her how I got my scar. I believe she's the first person I've ever willingly told. I even told her about my mom disappearing and she somewhat could relate to that, only she watched her mom die. She told me how and I felt some of the blame resting on me because it was my people that did that to her. Now I understood the importance behind that necklace she wears all the time. She took out some kind of vial with water in it and told me it might be able to heal my scar. I was skeptical at first and it seemed impossible, but I decided to let her try it.

The Avatar and my uncle burst through the wall right before she could do anything. The Avatar hugged Katara and gave me a glare that said "Stay away from her," and I sent one back that I hope looked like it said "Make me." Uncle started talking, but I wasn't really paying all that much attention because I was watching Katara run off with him. Azula stopped in after they left, had the Dai Li encase Uncle Iroh in crystal, and tried to talk me into joining her and taking the city, but I refused to betray Katara. She chased after them, then I released Uncle and we chased after her.

They were already battling her when we caught up, so I just jumped in and helped. Dai Li agents surrounded us and we were severly outnumbered, but they were outmatched by far. Surprisingly that's not the first time that's happened. I felt somewhat inferior to the others because I wasn't a master yet, but I think I did good. We beat them no problem and, as much as I wanted to take Azula down, I was proud of Katara for it. Apparently even a firebending prodigy is no match for a master waterbender.

She's locked up in the dungeon now as a P.O.W., along with her friends. I can't wait to see the look on my father's face when he gets the news. Uncle Iroh and I are safe in the city because we helped save it. We even got awards and Uncle is leading the Dai Li now. We're teaching the Avatar firebending and I get to stay close to Katara, but him and her brother are always watching us. Her brother and Toph are out looking for some people right now and Katara is writing something. I think maybe she keeps a journal too.

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**I was very tempted to stop right here because it'd be a good ending, but they haven't kissed yet! I don't know, you tell me! R&R!**

**Jenn**


	11. Chapter 11

_Katara, we need to talk about this. Now._

_-Sokka_

Dear Diary,

I guess Sokka found my hiding spot. I'm just glad he found it sooner rather than later because.. well, I'll start from the beginning. Iroh and Aang were firebending training this morning and Sokka and Toph were still out looking for Suki and the other warriors, so Zuko and I ran the tea shop. Innocent enough, right? I thought so too.

Well, Toph and Sokka were gone all day so Aang missed his earthbending lessons and he decided he wanted to help Iroh run the tea shop for a little while. They're getting along great. They even play Pai Sho together so Iroh bought some boards to put in the tea shop for everyone to play. Anyway, while they were busy working, Zuko and I were left to run around the city.

We stayed in the upper ring and, since he's now an honorary guest of the king, we found a big fountain and sparred without worrying about his firebending. I loved using my waterbending for fun instead of in battle. It seemed that's all I used it for in the last few days. Sparring was so much fun, especially when I froze the water under his feet and he slipped and fell into the fountain. That was so funny.

What was better, though, was that I just happened to be in the fountain already.. so when he fell, he landed on me. What can I say? I like to be in my element when I'm bending. Anyway, he was so cute with his hair all matted down on his forehead. I hadn't even noticed that my hair had come loose until he brushed a piece out of my face.

I was suddenly very aware of everything. The light from the lamps surrounding the fountain, the full moon, how you could see every star in the sky, and just how close Zuko was. Then he did the only thing that could've made that moment any more perfect. He kissed me. I'm still in a daze and it's making it hard to find a new hiding spot for this thing. I suppose I should go talk to Sokka now. This is going to be uncomfortable.

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Journal-

I kissed her! I can't believe I did that! One minute we were sparring, then we were in the fountain making out! I was more nervous right then than I'd ever been in my entire life! I blame her. Yes, that's it. It's her fault that I kissed her. She made me fall into the fountain on top of her, she made her hair fall out of its braid, she made the moon and stars shine in her eyes, she made me kiss her. And I'm still trying to catch my breath. I need to calm down before someone comes in here and suspects something.

Okay, so we've been together all day today. Since Uncle Iroh was teaching the Avatar firebending, Katara helped me run the tea shop. She was actually quite helpful and amused the customers by using her waterbending to serve their tea. Since I'm allowed to firebend now, I just used my hands to heat up the water to make the tea. Uncle taught me the secret to his tea and decided it would be a family secret recipe.

That evening, Uncle and the Avatar came in and took over. Katara told me I need to get used to calling him Aang, but I guess old habits die hard. I was grateful to them after that busy day, busier than normal because of Katara and her little "show". I was pretty tired, but she wanted to run around for a little while so we found a fountain and sparred.

The fountain was bigger and better than the one Jin took me to, so Katara waterbended the floating candles out of it and stepped in. She didn't even look like she was trying hard while I kind of was. It was just a spar and I knew I should've taken it easy, but she was blocking everything so easily that I had to step it up some. Then again, she had an advantage with the full moon out.

I was so busy firing at her that I didn't notice the water under my feet until she froze it and I slipped. Right into the fountain. On top of her. Like I said, it was all her fault. Uncle probably would've told me that it was romantic, but there's no way I'm telling him unless Katara decides that everyone can know--

Alright, so her brother knows. I've got the bruise on my jaw to prove it now. He just burst in here and yelled at me and punched me. Apparently we're going to have to talk with some people tomorrow. How fun.

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**Okay, so there's the kiss! And the "--" was supposed to be a mark across the page lol. R&R!**

**Jenn**


	12. Chapter 12

Dear Diary, 

This is going to be my last entry. Sokka told everyone about it so it's not a secret anymore and it kind of lost its meaning. I already kicked his butt for it.. and for the fact that he punched Zuko last night after I talked to him. That was uncalled for. So I got the gang together today and we all talked about it after everyone kept asking Zuko about the bruise on his cheek and before he could fry them all to a crisp for it.

I think Toph and Iroh were the only ones who'd taken it okay because they knew, but Sokka flipped out even more than he had last night and Aang just took off. He's been gone all day and I'm worried. I know he loves me, but I can't help that I don't feel the same. I'll try to talk to him when he gets back and explain one-on-one what's going on. Maybe he'll understand a little better when it's coming from just me and not a few different mouths at once.

Zuko and I don't get to spend much time together outside of the tea shop because Sokka's been breathing down my neck since he found out. It's almost like he cares more about my relationships than his own because he hasn't even mentioned Suki since yesterday morning. It makes me worry for her as well. Iroh has tried to talk to him, about both Suki and mine and Zuko's relationship, but he refuses to listen. He's acting the way he did right after Yue died and in a way it's heartbreaking.

We finished planning the Fire Nation invasion today at least. We've heard a lot of commotion coming from the cells below the palace recently, I assume from Azula, Ty Lee, and Mai. We decided they're to stay locked up in the city until after the invasion so they can't warn anyone about it, then we'll send them home. I kind of feel sorry for Azula. I can only imagine what Ozai would do to her for getting captured by the enemy if he scarred Zuko for disagreeing with a war strategy. Poor princess.

I guess it's going to be hard the next couple of months until the invasion. At least I'll be glad to do something other than waterbend tea to customers everyday. It's odd that just yesterday I was writing about how I was tired of fighting, but now I kind of miss it and can't wait to leave. And Zuko will be by my side the whole time. It still seems surreal to me sometimes, but I know I've fallen for him. Hard. Until next time.

Goodbye, Diary.

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Journal-

Today didn't go over so great (like I really expected to). Sokka may have found out last night but he freaked out more today anyway because we admitted to it, and Aang just flew off. I kind of feel bad for the kid. I've never had my heart broken by a girl I loved (apparently I'm the one always doing the heart breaking), but then again he's never lost a mother. Both are painful, that much I know, but I'm not sure which is more.

Since Sokka found Katara's diary, I don't think my journal is safe anymore either. He's been watching Katara day and night making sure she doesn't get too close to me. Who knows what he'd do to my room to find this thing if he knew I had one.. which he may because I was writing in it last night when he came in and punched me. So I guess this will be my last entry. And since it is and I plan on burning it after this, there are a few things I want to get out in writing since I'm afraid to say them out loud.

My father is an idiot. I hate him with all of my being and I hope to the great Agni above that I'll be the one to slaughter him unmercifully. I don't think Aang will progress far enough in his firebending training to defeat him, though he's pretty much got the other 3 elements down. Should he fail, I promise I won't. Then I'll go after Azula. She'll be marked and banished while I laugh in her face as she's done to me for 3 years. She will pay.

On a lighter note, Katara is absolutely amazing. Sokka would kill me for sure, or at least try, if he knew how deep my feelings for her ran. The way she moves with such grace and agility astonishes me and I can't help but stare when she waterbends the tea to our customers.. then I get yelled at by other customers for stopping what I'm doing. I can't help but notice every little thing about her, things I never would've noticed in any other girl. The way her nose crinkles a little when she laughs, the way her eyes light up when she sees something she likes, the way she starts fidgeting with her braid when she's nervous, and most of all the way she finds ways to dodge her brother's view to give me a kiss on the cheek.

I know our courtship would be looked down upon by a lot of the world, especially by her own people, but she has a way of reassuring me it will all be okay in the end. I hope she's right. I wouldn't mind Katara as my Fire Lady; I think she would make for a rather helpful and, at times, intimidating leader. She always seems to know what's best for everyone and can scare most men twice her age (including me sometimes), she would do perfectly in the royal court.. if she would have me, that is. That's what scares me more than anything: her rejection.

I guess this is goodbye, Journal.

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I guess I'm going to do a sequel for this! I hope you all enjoyed it and look for the sequel, though I'm unsure as of when I'm going to have it out. I've got a lot going on right now, including my daughter's upcoming 1st birthday next month. To tide you over, check out my other works, preferably **CoD: The Plan Unfolds**. A preview for that sequel is up in my profile so go check it out! Until next time (LOL), R&R!

Jenn


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